wahhhh

Last night I ended up going to a FSU party. It was cool being at a party from my college. I brought Beau, Riley, and Sophie along! My good friends from work were even there which was fun. Things have been getting better but then they get worse. I am honestly trying so hard for things to get better but it just sucks. Maybe I should have went away to school in Boston. Maybe I should have left Framingham and found myself. I am not Independent anymore, I look like a phony. I miss the way I used to be. Why cant I go back to normal? I feel that everyone is judging me like thinking that I have changed a lot. Even the closest person to me has told me that ive changed and this person doesnt like it at all. I wake up feeling like shit almost everyday and I have no one to talk to about it. I dont like telling everyone my problems because on the outside I seem fine but on the inside I am falling apart. I am not posting a picture today because I am crying. At least I have work in an hour. I enjoy going to work because it gets my mind off everything and my friends there dont know any of the stuff that goes on outside of work. It is a nice escape. Overall, I need to feel the same affection back that I give out. It will only get better if we try. Sorry for being so shitty and depressing. I know I suck lately. I am gonna regret typing all this because I try to keep a happy blog.

See ya